Monday, July 2, 2012

Trust #1

I was looking for signs. For messages. For texts. From God.

I wanted to know "What is his will for my life?"

During a breakfast meeting, a thought hit me. I need to find a mentor from church to talk to about this. One woman's name immediately filled my head. Barb. I only knew her in passing, but I admired her for her love of the Word and for her amazing life in mission work.

The next Sunday, with tears in my eyes and a baby on my hip, I asked Barb to lunch. She couldn't say "no." I told her that I had been struggling with some choices and I wanted her opinion. I secretly hoped that God would send me an answer through her.

We went to lunch later that week. I explained all that was going on. After she asked me a bunch of different questions, I asked her "Is there a verse that I can meditate on in regards to this decision?"

She said... "well, this is the one that I can think of right now: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding." 

My heart wasn't quite ready to hear that or try to understand it. I wanted a sign from God. I needed some understanding...I looked for signs and messages in everyone that I spoke to. I wanted affirmations to the plans I was making in my head and heart. I wanted to know that I was moving in the right direction.

But SEEING SIGNS doesn't require FAITH. KNOWING doesn't require TRUST.

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